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Friday, January 13, 2012

Just a Sleepless Dream

I meant to post this from my Facebook account yesterday, but sometimes life moves faster than I am able!

Fortunately, I do eventually get around to paving my Road of Good Intentions!


This morning I awake from the tossing, and turning, and sleepless night dream which portends a day to follow filled with dark things and a lack of zeal. For sleeplessness underscores my body's need for something that it thinks is separate from God/dess. I expect that lack of sleep is somehow detrimental to my well-being. 

But my body is not real; it is my ego's greatest tool to distract me from the truth of the only thing that is real about me: my Inner Self. 

My little, frightened ego waves sleeplessness (or threatening headlines, a mild headache, my thinning hair, or a death in the family) in front of me like a pick pocket waving a newspaper; its aim to deflect my attention from the truth of who and what I am.

But years of experience with the false prophet (ego) enables me to turn my back on it and merely watch it -- knowingly -- from the corner of my eye. Sneaky ego -- you want me to forget that I can awaken from all the dreams (and layers of dreams) and merely allow Peace to carry me above them.

I choose to awaken today; I choose to remember that I awakened yesterday; I choose to remember that I will be awakened tomorrow.

All is well.

[Note: As I progressed through the writing of this piece, the sun burst through the gray clouds here in Washington, DC.]

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Monday, January 2, 2012

Outlook 2012

Well, it's 2012 and -- depending on your belief system and your general life outlook -- this is either going to be the most fantastic year of our lives or the very last one.

According to how some perceive the calendar of the ancient Maya, this year (2012) is going to:

  • End on Doomsday, December 21, 
  • Be the beginning, middle, and/or end of a massive, tumultuous cosmic-shift in global human consciousness that will result in the transformation of survivors into enlightened beings, or
  • Wind up being just another year

Of course, the Mayan Calendar deal could really just be another instance of "you say" and "I say" ways of looking at the world and the expectations we bring to our everyday lives.

I myself, depending upon the degree of my own contact with my Inner Self at a given moment, have wavered on this theoretical event over the years -- going so far as to get into pissing matches about it with good, kind people during all sorts of social engagements. Deleting some, patronizing others, and completely grokking or otherwise resonating and commiserating with still others.

Part of me wants to believe that the world is ending (e.g. the undeserving are going to be crushed out of existence by some knowing God/dess or entity who, like Santa Claus, is keeping track of all our good and bad deeds.). While the other part of me knows with a passion and certainty that nothing like this could or would happen in a universe that is intrinsically neutral and merely a reflection of my own internal condition, inner beliefs, and expectations. In other words, reality is a reflection of what I believe ... what I expect is what I get.

The key here, of course, is understanding that the "part" of me that wants to be rewarded for "being good" and seeks revenge on the "bad ones" is my ego or lower self. The other part of me, my inner Higher Self, knows that there is no such thing as"bad" -- because we all come from the same Source, what some call God, Goddess, The Force, Higher Self, Jesus, Holy Spirit, Great Father/Mother, or etc.

The spirit of this belief system is one of non-duality. Only God exists and everything that appears to exist outside of God is merely an illusion. But, as physicist Albert Einstein said, it's a very persistent illusion. Ultimately, we created the illusion when we were "born" into it and maintained it -- alone and with the assistance of well-meaning others -- throughout our lives. The longer we allowed this illusion to exist, the stronger it became and the more difficult to expose as the lie that it truly is.
A wise man, recognizing that the world is but an illusion, does not act as if it is real, so he escapes the suffering. – Buddha (Hindu Prince Gautama Siddharta, the founder of Buddhism, 563-483 B.C.)
An important part of the illusion -- which really snags us -- is the idea of lack and limitation. We believe we are inferior to our Source -- forgetting that we are children or outpourings of the source. As such, we are at least heirs to the Source and heirs to the "kingdom" it represents. Since our separation from Source is basically impossible, we can't really lack anything or be limited by anything. But our experience in this world of form often suggests otherwise.

That's because our egos manipulate us into believing its lies -- and we become persuaded or convinced that those lies must be true. People die in this world of form, for instance, therefore form must exist and form must ultimately become nonexistent. But form, which is fluid and which can be destroyed, is not real. Spirit, which is changeless and very real, is immortal.
Not one thing in the world is true. It does not matter what the form in which it may appear. It witnesses but to your own illusions of yourself. Let us not be deceived today. We are the Sons of God. There is no fear in us, for we are each a part of Love itself. – Lesson 240, A Course In Miracles
Practicing meditation and other forms of experiential union with Your Source can help you understand that form doesn't really exist; it's an illusion or a covering placed over truth to mislead you. Beneath all form (including the form of life and death) exists the reality of Oneness. It can't die because it is changeless and is the Source of everything.  If it has to have a name, the closest word I can come to define the nature of Source would be love.
‎It's better to die to who we think we are before who we think we are dies. -- Thomas Vieira 
Over the last eleven years (give or take a few) I began this serious venture into spiritual self-introspection that has led me to where I am today. Where I am today is basically the same person I was when I first ventured on that path, but with a lot less misperceptions of who I am, expectations about how I coulda shoulda woulda been, and with a lot less emotional, spiritual, and physical baggage than I had before starting on the path. (I'm defining "baggage" here as all the clutter that I've carried around in my head and stored in my various closets.)

I, myself, am not "there" yet, by any stretch of the imagination, but I am working at it as best I can, one day at a time, and with varying degrees of success.
One of the reasons I love social media sites -- like Facebook, Google+, and LinkedIn -- is that they expose my real self to the world.  Many people are very worried about security and identification theft, etc. -- whereas I am more concerned with the daily theft of who I am -- by my ego.  By putting "myself" out there every day, I am letting all of you (who are reflections of my own inner self, right?) have a shot at showing me my own warts, defects of character, and bags of crapola. I don't like that when it happens -- but it keeps me more in line than I can be when I traverse this path alone.
The ego is not master in its own house. – From A Difficulty in the Path of Psycho-Analysis, 1917.
Thus, you all become my greatest teachers and I get to witness my own personal healing on a deep level of self.

Here are a few of my own personal projects and plans for the year 2012:
  • Decide whether to stay in Washington, DC longer or move to another area, possibly Ft. Lauderdale, to continue my life journey.
  • Continue my studies of non-duality and spirituality, specifically through A Course in Miracles and teachers like Adyashanti (website, video: Welcome to Reality, Bentinho Massaro (website, video: Understanding Life is Impossible), and Jed McKenna ; possibly start a meetup group to offer a way to contemplate non-duality with others.
  • Through the meetup group, Gay and Retired Elders and the People Who Love Them, discover more like-minded retirees in the area with which to hang out.
  • Through the meetup group, The Tribe of Beltway Shamans, learning more about shamanic healing and how to be a caretaker of the planet upon which we still live.
  • Through my Facebook, Google+, and LinkedIn pages, maintain conscious contact with all my friends and teachers, old and new.
  • Through my personal site, DREAMWalker Group, continue attempting, with your help, to give cold cash back to the literary community. I do this by sharing my commissions from book and other sales with literary community-minded sites and individual. (See why I think you should consider helping me with this by buying all your books and other items through the links on my site ... here and here.
  • Through another personal site, Awakened Man, offer my creative talents (writing, social media management, and healing of body/mind/spirit through a variety of techniques) to other students and teachers. While, at the same time, put together enough cold, hard cash to support myself.
  • Decide what I want to be when I grow up.
My conscious effort at self-knowing has led me to a more balanced lifestyle of relaxation, using better coping strategies (at times), gaining better skills for communicating, and modifying my behaviors to have a happier and healthier life.

Some days seem to be failures at personal growth; other days seems huge successes. It's the old one step backward, five steps forward thing.

I prefer to think of our personal and spiritual development more like a spiral staircase rising toward the sky. While we're on the staircase, climbing higher and higher, the vantage point seems to change very little. But with each step we take -- though the view seems only partially changed -- we are still moving further along and higher than we were the step before.

The groovy part is that there's room on the staircase for all of us, together!

Life's all good -- and all is well


If you haven't let it go, you're still holding on.
      -- Michael Walker, February 3, 2011

If your like what you read here ... please post comments.  They help me with my life journey!
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